The New Authority: Family, School, and Community by Haim Omer

By Haim Omer

Dr. Haim Omer builds on his past paintings to provide a brand new version of authority for fogeys, lecturers, and group staff that's appropriate for today's loose and pluralistic societies. This new authority contrasts with conventional authority in that it emphasizes self-discipline and endurance over regulate of the kid, a community of aid over a strict hierarchy, taking mutual accountability for escalations over maintaining the kid exclusively dependable, endurance over threats, non-violent resistance over actual strength, and transparency over secrecy. as well as a radical dialogue of the underlying conception, the hot Authority offers a pragmatic software for households, faculties, and groups. Dr. Omer offers particular directions to strive against violence and dicy habit at domestic and in class, elevate mum or dad and instructor curiosity and help, and enforce interventions that bring up safeguard, enhance surroundings, and generate group cohesiveness.

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Sample text

This restraint is not experienced as weakness, but as inner strength, because the authority person knows in his heart that he will deal with the problem later on. ” There is a positive undertone to this response, for the child has discovered that the parent has continued relating to him. In this way the experience of authority, for both child and adult, changes from that of a fleeting confrontation to that of a continuing presence. A 14-year-old girl noticed that her father had the habit of consulting the book, “Parental Presence” (Omer, 2000) after clashes with her.

Maternal supervision fluctuates continuously, from a state of relaxation when the mother can be occupied with other things, to a state of alertness, where the mother senses the baby’s warning signs and moves in closer, to a state of action, where she steps in to protect her child. These fluctuating states of vigilant care also are evident as the child grows. When parents bring their children to the playground, take them for a walk, or help them learn how to ride a bike, their levels of attentiveness, presence, and protection change constantly.

Dan’s parents told him that the deduction from his allowance had been lowered to 15%, so that he could resume going out with his friends without embarrassment. At this point the therapy sessions with the parents ceased, but the therapist was on call if needed. After eighteen months, the parents sent the therapist a letter with an invitation to Dan’s Bar Mitzvah. They said that the atmosphere at home was much improved. During the entire period, there had been no incidents of vandalism or physical violence.

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